The Things That Go Wrong
by MorThreeo
Summary: The realationship between James and Lily is always unsteady. He adores her, she fights to conceal mutual sentiments. How can he win his girl forever? Will he? CHAPTER 6 UP! Some language in this chapter. You have been warned. ;)
1. His Wish

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I own none of these characters, but I wish I owned James! He's sooo handsome (even though he is a bit of a git.) A/N: This is my first Harry Potter fiction, and only my second fic. in total, so go easy on me, but please review. I really hope you like it. I'm also very proud of myself because I posted this all by myself and I am NOT a computer wizard. Enjoy reading!  
  
The Things That Go Wrong  
Chapter I: His Wish. James Potter brushed his hair back casually. Lily Evans thought he was being conceited, but by now it was just a habit. Lily. He hoped that she would look at him. They were sitting beside each other in class, after all. James wished that they could become a couple. And that she wouldn't look at him like that. When she could bring herself to look at him. He wanted to hold her in his arms, to look into her eyes. James realized he was staring at Lily. He shook his head.  
It was halfway through James' 6th year at Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardry. He had had a crush on Lily Evans since 3rd year, when he had become the star seeker for the Gryffindor House Quidditch Team. He didn't know why she didn't like him. As a matter of fact, most of the girls did. He tried to be nice to her. It must be Snivellus Snape's fault. He couldn't help it that Snape tried to jinx him every time he walked around the corner. What was he supposed to do, take it lying down like a coward? James knew that he loved Lily, and that he wanted to marry her. Last year, went he had taunted Snape so mercilessly, Lily had accused him of being egotistic, arrogant, selfish and proud. He had tried to stop doing that. She still hated him.  
James took a piece of parchment out of his bag. On it he wrote:  
"Padfoot, can you ask Evans why she won't go out with me? Tell me in the common room later this evening. You can catch her in the hall on the way to the Ravenclaw common room." (A/N: I didn't know which house Lily was in so I just put her in the house I felt like.)  
James took out his wand and whispered an enchantment "Wingarduim Leviosa." The roll of parchment flew over his shoulder onto Sirius' desk. Lily scowled at him. He is always trying to show off, she thought. James threw her a pleading look. "Please. Evans, I wasn't trying to show off."  
Lily turned her head, but she blushed.  
"Mr. Potter." Transfiguration Professor Minerva McGonagall pronounced crisply. James groaned inwardly. He was in trouble. Another detention. Why am I the only one that ever gets caught? Padfoot and Moony pass notes all the time, but does McGonagall catch them? No. Figures.  
"I suppose you think that you are above listening to my class?"  
Lily threw James a scathing look. Thought James angrily, This is a conspiracy to make Lily hate me.  
"No Professor McGonagall. I was apologizing to Miss Evans. I'm sorry if I disrupted the class."  
Lily's heart skipped a beat. Miss Evans? James can be so polite. And he looks so calm and collected, so.cool. And he's the star of the Quidditch team. He is so handsome. All the girls love him. What? Am I talking about Potter? No, he is a jerk!! The pang of admiration and love that overcame Lily for those seconds was very much like what happened to many girls every time James came into their presence.  
"I was annoying her, I'm afraid. I'm very sorry Miss Evans, and Professor McGonagall."  
Annoying me? How could he annoy me? He is so brave, speaking up there, telling the truth so boldly. Sigh. What? Evans, get a grip on yourself! This is Potter we're talking about!  
"What were you doing to annoy Evans, Potter?"  
James thought fast. He could only think of one thing to say. If he said he asked Lily to repeat something about McGonagall's lecture, then she would think he wasn't listening, and there would be more homework.  
"I was asking Miss Evans if she would like to go out with me to Hogsmeade this weekend."  
"Potter, save your sentiments till after class. Detention."  
Whew. Only detention. Good.  
James apologized to Lily with his eyes. She smiled, but she couldn't figure out why. As McGonagall turned back to the blackboard, a scroll poked James in the back. He opened it. "Prongs. Well, mate, frankly, I think that I already know the answer, but I'll ask anyway." James heard a whispered incantation behind him. "Scripto." More writing appeared on the scroll, "Actually, did you see the way she looked at you when you apologized? You might have a chance, mate." James smiled. Lily might actually like him.  
Lily looked at him sideways in a spasm of compassion. He was smiling broadly, and leaning back in his chair. He thinks that he has a chance with me, eh? Lily's mood turned sour. Let him try. Her heart ached. She realized she liked him. But she had to teach him that he wasn't the king of the world. 


	2. Her Wish

Disclaimer: I own none of these characters. There, that's over with. A/N: I tried to do as some of the reviewers suggested: put more spaces between lines and paragraphs, but, like I said last chapter, I am NOT a computer wizard, so something is bound to go wrong. Anyway, read and please REVIEW!!!  
  
Chapter II: Her Wish  
  
Lily walked out of Transfiguration clearly annoyed about something. James nodded to Sirius, who quickened his strides so that they equalled Lily's own. James vanished around the corner. Lily turned to look at Sirius.  
"Hello Sirius. What do you want?"  
  
"Uhh, James wants to know why you won't go out with him."  
  
Thought Lily: I won't go out with him? Of course I will! Said Lily: "Because he is self-centred and arrogant. I won't go out with him until he changes his ways." Lily couldn't believe that she had said that! She had refused to go out with James Potter?  
  
Sirius frowned. "How could he change? The poor blokes trying, Evans!"  
  
Lily's heart beat. Change? Why? He suits me just fine! Opps, did I just say that? Oh, no, I was thinking it. Even thinking about James is getting dangerous.  
  
"I don't know Sirius." She snapped, annoyed at Sirius and herself. I would go out with him. I would, I would! Evans, get a grip on yourself!  
  
Sirius leaned casually on the wall in the typical "flirting pose." "So, Evans, would you go out with me?" he said jokingly. (A/N: Lets hope. Lily is so James'!)  
  
Lily's mind went into turmoil. She couldn't tell that Sirius was joking. Her mind was too upset by her newfound feelings for James.  
  
I can't let James know that I.love him. I just thought that? Am I obsessed with James all of a sudden? I can't let James know. He would follow me around like a little puppy dog. She laughed. I would love that.  
  
"Oh, uh, well, I suppose Sirius. It's nice of you to ask. I'll see you in the Hall tomorrow. Bye."  
  
Sirius' mouth fell open. I'm in for it. Can't people tell when you're joking? James 'll have my head. But why the hell did she say yes? I'll talk to Moony. He knows his stuff.  
  
Shaking his head, Sirius walked up the stairs to the common room, muttered the password, ( Dancing Dragons) and entered. Lupin was there waiting with James. James stepped forward eagerly.  
  
"News? What did she say?"  
  
"Uhh, mate, I think you better sit down."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Quarter Hour Later  
  
" Ohh. All right. I'll go to my dormitory now. Night."  
  
"Prongs, mate, you do understand that I don't well, like this Evans girl. I mean, she's nice and all, but."  
  
"Yeah, whatever." James trudged listlessly up to his room.  
  
"Moony, we gotta talk. I wondering why Evans said she would go with me. In Transfiguration I thought I could read her face like a book. I think that she really likes James. Yeah, she took 5 minutes to say that she'd go with me. Is that a good sign or a bad one? For James I mean."  
  
"Uh, well, I saw her too. She is definitely hiding something. If she took 5 minutes to answer, then she was probably thinking if this "realationship" with you could hide her feelings for James."  
  
"Moony, how do you know so much about girls? It's truly amazing."  
  
"I have 11 sisters and 7 aunts. I'm the only boy left in 3 generations. Family reunions are a nightmare."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: So, how do you like it? Review to show me you care! In case anybody actually likes this story and can't wait for me to update, I'll be in Newfoundland for the next to weeks! HA HA HA! I've already finished the next 4 chapters and will probably will have finished the story by the time I get back. In case anybody cares, there will be a sequel, entitled: Oops, I Shouldn't Have Said That. So, if anybody has noticed my extremely low morale (ex: In case anybody cares) then help me so I can summon the courage to post the next chapter and review the story!!!! 


	3. The Realtionship

Disclaimer: I own none of these characters, blah, blah, blah. A/N: As you can see, I'm trying to fix the spacing. I have been trying to update for the past week or so, but there is something wrong with the computer and it refuses to post. So I'm hoping that it actually worked this time.  
  
Chapter III: The "Relationship"  
  
Sirius nervously smoothed the front of his robes. And turned to James, who was sitting morosely by the fireplace. "Prongs, mate, I'm sorry about all this. Please don't be mad."  
  
"I'm not mad. Have a good time with Evans. I might be walking to Hogsmeade later with Moony." His voice was odd, and detached. James slunk sulkily into the dormitory.  
  
Sirius sighed. He wished that he had never even talked to Lily, much less joke around with her. James had been like this for a week. He had told Remus that he planned to play only one more Quidditch match. Coincedently, it was versus Ravenclaw.  
  
Padfoot climbed through the portrait hole and slid down several banisters on his way to the Great Hall. Filch was at the door way, checking permits. From his superior height, Sirius surveyed the hall. Lily's read hair stood out like a sore thumb. Filch checked their certification and waved them through grumpily.  
  
Snow landed softly on Lily's hair as they walked through the Hogsmeade streets. Sirius was grumpy. He couldn't decide what do. Should he grab Lily's hand as it dangled by his side., or just leave it? He thought back to the common room, and James. He would grab Lily's hand without hesitation if it were him. He gritted his teeth. Be brave, Black. Think calmly. Just a date. Just a date.  
  
He grabbed her hand, but even as he did, he saw James ahead of them. He let go of Lily's hand quickly, as if he had been caught eating cookies just before supper, or picked up a red-hot coal.  
  
"Uh, hey James. Want to. uh, join us?"  
  
Lily sighed. I know I would rather be with James than Sirius, but asking a someone your date supposedly hates to walk around with you is not something that you do!  
  
"No thanks. Have a good time. Bye." But his eyes spoke a thousand words. They said: I wish that I was Sirius right now. I can't believe that she could act this way, fawning all over him, right in front of me, when she knows I love her. She knows that, but she doesn't understand that I would do anything to be with her, but she keeps turning up at the wrong time! I haven't picked on Snape in months.  
  
Sirius and Lily walked on. They turned the corner and entered the Three Broomsticks. Sirius paid for two Butterbeers and they sat down in a booth. Everbody was staring at them. Sirius started to wonder what he had done.  
  
Do I have spinach in my teeth or what? This is surreal. Everybody is staring at me, I'm with the girl my best friend loves, and I think that I have spinach between my teeth. Too weird.  
  
Lily however, did not find it surreal. She found it annoying, but decided to ignore them. She tried to make conversation to Sirius about the weather, and Quidditch.  
  
"So, Sirius, did you try out for Keeper earlier this year? I heard that you did"  
  
"I didn't. I'm trying for Chaser next year though."  
  
"Umm, it's nice out, isn't it?"  
  
"Yeah, real nice."  
  
"Did you finish that really hard Herbology essay?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Uh, well, I have to go back to the common room and finish it. Bye."  
  
Lily knew that that was a very rude way to leave, but she could not stand talking to a log anymore. Stepping out into the sunlight, she hightailed it back to the castle.  
  
Back in the Three Broomsticks, Sirius paid for the Butterbeer and left. I swear, I will never understand girls. I thought I was doing okay.  
  
The door of Zonko's opened and Amanda Lewis stepped out.  
  
"Hi Amanda. It's me, Sirius." We've talked before. I hope she'll remember me. She's a cutie.  
  
"Hi Sirius. I remember you. How could I forget that handsome face. We're you here with someone?"  
  
Sirius sighed happily. Oh, yeah. I'm handsome. Play it smooth , Sirius, smooth.  
"Uhh, yeah, but she left. Wanna walk with me back to the castle?"  
  
"Sure." Sigh. He's a bad boy.  
  
A/N: Okay, I hope that you liked this chapter. I made Sirius extra goofy. I hope that the spacing has improved. I would like to thank every body that has reviewed, but especially Elwood Penscottie, because she reviewed first and made me feel special! Also thanks to: Angel 350, Draco's Special Girl, Spark1, clueless, purplee.(something about elephants), Bridgette and Brooke Kenobi. Buye the way, Brooke I have read some of your fics and they are really good! Bye, Lilac/Steph 


	4. Injuring Yourself Isn't a Great Way to P...

Disclaimer: Okay, I think that we have already established the point that I'm not rich enough to be J.K Rowling, so, basically, I own nothing. A/N: Since it took so long for my computer to work (grrrr) so that I could update, I decided to post the next chapter that day after, as a sort of apology. Enjoy.  
  
Chapter IV: Quidditch  
  
It was the day of the Gryffindor/Ravenclaw quidditch match, the game James declared would be his last. As the Gryffindor team stepped out on to the pitch, they were greeted by blinding sunlight and loud cheers. James was the only member of the team who did not acknowledge the cheers.  
  
When you don't care about Quidditch anymore, thought James heavily, then you know it's bad. I might as well just leave Hogwarts and try to get over her. Moony thinks that I have a chance with her. Yeah right. It's hard not to be mad at Sirius. Well, I might as well end this game soon.  
  
As the Ravenclaw team walked out onto the pitch, James saw the newly elected seeker. His jaw dropped. I'm competing against the girl I want to marry. God, how ironic can you get.  
  
Shaking his head, he mounted his broom and kicked off at the whistle. From the very start of the game, one bludger seemed to be acting oddly. It was targeting only certain people. One of them was Lily. (A/N: Dum, dum, dummm!)  
  
James knew something was wrong, even though he wasn't concentrating on that. The Beaters seemed very confused, and, James noticed, weren't doing their jobs. James saw a bludger heading for their star chaser.  
  
"Arthur! Cover Molly!" the Arthur Weaseley nodded and urged his broom to keep up with the bludger. Turning back around to look for the snitch, James saw Lily diving. Assuming instinctively that she had dove for the snitch, James urged his broom towards her.  
  
Then he saw the bludger. It was aiming directly for Lily's head. Lily, intent on the chase, ignored the bludger entirely. In a spasm of fear for Lily's safety, James pushed his broom ahead and shoved Lily out of the way.  
  
"Potter, what the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" yelled Lily as she pulled into a roll. Then she saw the bludger, level with her head. But James was in it's way! It hit James with full force in the chest and ricocheted into the hands of the referee. James turned a deathly still white, mumbled "That. really. hurt." And tumbled 40 feet into the ground, the Snitch in his hand. Lily dove sharply towards the ground and skidded into her feet, barley avoiding a crash landing.  
  
Madame Pomfrey was already running towards James.  
  
"Stand aside everybody. This boy needs air. The most important thing is to revive him. Hurry, hurry, conjure a stretcher. Evans, get out of the way!"  
  
No, thought Lily, desperately and stubbornly, No! James risked his life for me! I can't leave him! I can't! Who cares if everybody knows that I love him! If he ever comes back from this.  
  
James, James, James, wake up! Wake up!"  
  
"Evans, get away from that boy! He needs air!"  
  
"JAMES!"  
  
"Evans! I said MOVE!"  
  
"James?" whispered Lily. "James, sweetheart. Wake up."  
  
"James' eyes flickered open. "What?" he said sluggishly.  
  
Lily breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"Somebody get this girl out of the way."  
  
A/N: So, how did you like? I know that my attempt at a quidditch games was crap. That's alright. 


	5. Sirius you Naughty Boy

A/N: I'm SO SORRY that it has taken so long to turn out this chapter, but I had to go back to school, my new teacher is an insane raving lunatic, I've thought up ideas for three other stories, one, with Tamsy and Daine, that is called Triple Threat and two with really weird ideas, that I probably won't get around to posting until December (if you're lucky).  
  
Disclaimer: Repeat after me- I'm-not-J.K.-Rowling. Good! You got it! No say it for every other chapter I post....  
  
The Things That Go Wrong  
  
Chapter V: The Flirt (or, Sirius you naughty boy)  
  
Lily walked back into the castle, broomstick over her shoulder, reflecting seriously on the possibilities of a relationship with James Potter (A/N: Tee hee). As Lily walked up staircase #287, she decided to go to the broom cupboard and think. She often did this. It was so easy to think when not surrounded by constant chatter. Lily put her hand on the yelling knob of the door and turned.  
  
"Ahem. ?? Sirius!"  
  
Sirius Black jumped about a foot in the air, banging his head on a broom and breaking off his embrace with Amanda Lewis.  
  
"Uhhh.hi.Lily." The veins in Sirius' neck were standing out and his face was burning red.  
  
"So, what are you two doing here?"  
  
"Oh my gosh," said Amanda anxiously "Are you two, umm, going out, I heard some rumours, and, but I didn't think."  
  
"It's okay Amanda, you can have this sorry piece of work." Said Lily, pleased that she had a good excuse for breaking up with Sirus. "Oh, by the way, do you know if James is in the hospital wing yet?"  
  
Sirius jumped in the air again. "Hospital wing! Why? What happened?"  
  
"Oh, just the usual. Bludger at full speed in the chest. He'll be fine. Enjoy each others company." Lily wiggled her eyebrows and shut the door. She skipped up the staircase to see James in the hospital wing.  
  
Lily opened the door and peaked into the wing. Mme. Pomfrey wasn't anywhere, so Lily came in. Creeping up to James' bedside, she watched him sleep, dark eyes closed, black hair trickling onto his forehead. She impulsively reached out and touched his cheek. James' eyes snapped open and stared into hers.  
  
"Hello James. Are you alright?"  
  
"Only three broken bones. I'll be fine. Lily."  
  
Lily reached over and kissed his forehead. "Sleep tight sweetheart."  
  
James smiled widely. "YES! HA HAA! WOO HOO! Lily likes me, Lily likes me!"  
  
Lily shook her head gently and gave James another big hug. "Silly boy. Silly, silly, silly boy."  
  
"Hey, lovebirds, keep it down over there." Yelled a foreign voice.  
  
Lily touched her finger to her mouth, gave James' hand a squeeze and disappered into the corridor.  
  
James was still smiling when the voice said: "'Night, lovebird."  
  
"Night Johnson." He replied dreamily, and drifted into dreams of Lily.  
  
A/N: I know, I know, that chapter was short. But be glad I'm posting this, if you do like my story, because I leaving to go camping with my dad this weekend. We're leaving at 8:00 in the morning, and I got up at 6:30 with the specific intention of posting this for you people! 


	6. Rotten Eggs and Hard Luck

A/N: I have finished the story, but it's annoying to have to type it all up on the computer, so, shame on me, I don't get around to doing it often.  
  
Disclaimer: J.K: "I give up Stephanie McBride owns Harry Potter! I've been lying to you all!" (or would it just be easier to say that I don't own Harry Potter, or unfortunately, Ron Weaseley, than get all the rights changed and brainwash J.K. But ANYWAY.  
  
Chapter VI: Rotten Eggs and Hard Luck.  
  
James woke up in the morning with starry eyes and a good mood. He hunted around under his bed for his robes and got changed. Relaxing on his bed, he opened a package of Chocolate Frogs sent to him by one of his Secret Admirers and started reading Quidditch Quaffles: a novel. The door of the hospital wing opened and Snape walked in.  
  
Now, James was in a good enough mood to greet ANYBODY.  
  
"Hello Snape. Chocolate Frog? I have plenty." James held out a Chocolate Frog to Snape and smiled. The Frog leaped out of his hand and crawled under the bed, but he picked up another one, repeating the same offer.  
  
Snape looked at him in disgust. "Why are you so bloody cheerful Potter. Mudblood finally accept you? That's so pathetic."Snape grabbed the Frog roughly from James' hand and bit it's head off. He threw the wrapper onto James' bed.  
  
James' mouth compressed into one thin line. "Snape, take that back. Never call Lily that again."  
  
Snape looked around the room in mock horror. "Who's here to stop me Potter? You're and invalid after you're nasty, heroic fall from a big, scarewey broomysticky!" Snape made a baby face and laughed at James. James pulled his wand from his robes. I really don't want to do this, for Lily's sake, but if he says one more thing.  
  
"So, Potty-pants, you had to settle for a Mudblood? To bad. Well, Gryffindors are all scum. They're all half-bloods or mudbloods. All filth."  
  
James discretely pointed his wand at Snape and muttered a quick spell under his breath. "Expelliarmus."  
  
Snape's wand shot out of his hands, but before James could grab it, Snape made a mad dive for it and grabbed it. Snape pulled into a roll, stood up and shot the disarming spell at James. James jumped out of bed and the spell hit the wall, knocking several sleeping pictures askew. T5he pictures woke up, saw what was happening and quickly mumbled things about dentist appointments, scuttling off into the shadows at the other end of the room. Snape shot the dancing spell at James, who threw up a shield in the nick of time. (A/N: As my grandpa says.)  
  
The drawn battle continued, Snape and James casting spell after spell at each other. Few of Snape's spells found their mark, thank to James' hours of Quidditch training, and all James' hexes lost power quickly, thanks (A/N: Or un-thanks to, if that's a word) to Snape's (freaky) knowledge of the dark arts, and consequently the knowledge of how to protect himself.  
  
Let us gentile-type people leave the scene of this gruesome (well, not REALLY) battle and find one of the other gentile type people in this gosh- forsaken castle. Namely, to make a long story short, well, it isn't really that long, I suppose, in moderation, anyway, let us turn to one of the gentile type people in this castle, namely, to make a long story short, Lily (wow, this is like a Charles Dickens sentence it just goes on and on and on this is the song that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends! some people, started singing it not knowing what it was.and now they'll keep on singing it forever just because, hey, have you noticed that this sentence still isn't over? have you guessed that I was on sugar high when I wrote this so I am not responsible for my actions, holy crap this is a long sentence I need to breathe, the end). ANYWAY:  
  
Lily walked happily along the corridor, struggling with a rather large box. It contained a months supply of Zonko products, and was a gift for James.  
  
I only hope that he doesn't use the rotten exploding eggs on Snape. Man those thing stink forever. Actually, he hasn't picked a fight with Snape for SO long! At least three months! I'll congratulate him on that when I finally make it to the hospital wing.  
  
Several minutes later, Lily set the box down in front of the hospital wing door and opened it. She picked up the box, her eyes cast down, and elbowed the door open.  
  
"JAMES! WE ARE FINISHED! OVER! And we haven't even been on a date yet.... BUT THAT'S NO EXCUSE! AS SOON AS I ACCEPT YOU, YOU THINK YOU CAN ACT LIKE AN ASS AGAIN WITH NO CONSEQUENCES? WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR DAMN PROBLEM! I HATE MEN!" Lily turned and ran out of the room, crying. The box fell to the ground and exploded, the rotten exploding eggs adding and icky smell to James' gloom.  
  
A/N: It is the song that never ends..... yes it goes on and on my friends.. Some people started singing it not knowing what it was (sing with me people) and now they'll keep on singing it forever just because...(music fades into the background) 


	7. Philosophical Discussion

A/n: I'm SORRY that I haven't updated in so long. I've been lazy/ busy. So, I thought that you 19 people that reviewed deserved a chapter update. I'd just like to say two, sorry, three , sorry four things: a huge thank you to MissMaurader1. I have been trying to remember to e-mail you thanking you, but for SOME reason, I always forgot. Second thing: I recommend that you read When Things Start To Change New, by Hermione-G-Granger (I think that that's her pen name). I'm not her publicity agent or anything, but it's a very good read, even if she does cut it off halfway through because the fifth book came out and she thought it wouldn't be "right to continue". Stupid artistic temperment. Third thing: Pirates of the Caribbean is coming out soon! YES! Orlando..Johnny Depp.. *drools slightly* fourth thing: RON WEASLEY ROX MY SOX! Thank you!  
  
Disclaimer: Ahem- I-OWN-NOTHING-AT-ALL-SO-GET-IT-THROUGH-YOUR-HEADS! HA-HA- YOU-CAN'T-SUE-ME!  
  
Chapter Eight: Philosophical Discussion  
  
James simply stood in the hospital wing for several minutes. Lily. Where was she? What was she so mad about anyway? Damn, thought James, running out of the hospital wing, yet another "philosophical discussion" to have. He ran towards the Ravenclaw common room and saw Lily far down the hall, about to enter the "girl's washroom door" that lead to the Ravenclaw section of the building. (A/n: It was the best I could do, okay?)  
  
"Lily! Wait up! It's me, James." James ran faster and caught up to Lily. "Lily, why are you mad at me? Snape called you a mud-"  
  
"James!" Lily interrupted heatedly, "The issue is not what Snape did or didn't call me! The issue is you! Why do you try and get into fights with him? Why do you try and annoy him? What's the point? So you can prove that you're a bigger 'man' than he is? Real men don't pick on others just because they can you insensitive- prat! Now if you'll excuse me, master of manliness, I'm going to my dorm to see if somebody respectable will take an interest in me. Or do I only attract shallow, self centred breeding machines?" Lily turned to go but James grabbed her arm and stopped her.  
  
"Lily, I don't pick fights with Snape! He was calling you a - a mudblood. I know that you can stick up for yourself and all that shit, but I'm in love with you, okay? So I didn't want to let him insult you. Can you live with that, princess? Or is any display of affection to gauche for you? And I am not a breeding machine! I haven't even shagged a girl, so-so yeah!"  
  
"I don't care if he called me a fucking mudblood! I wouldn't even care if you called me a mudblood! What I do care about is the fact that you are so- so-so focused on your 'manliness'. You think it's so cool, going parading thru the halls, flinging your snitch around everywhere, flirting with all the girls, even if, as you declare, you haven't 'shagged any'. Like I believe that! You flirt with them all day and 'talk with them' all night, so we are not even going to get into that. Point is, you've been picking on Snape ever since the first day of school in Year One. If I remember correctly, you called him a 'greasy, smile ball with a pointy nose and dust between the ears."  
  
James almost laughed at the recollection, but then decided that it might not be very wise. "Lily, on the train he called me a 'stupid, good for nothing mudblood and muggle lover' and then he stole Peter's pet rat and wouldn't give it back until we got on the boats. And then, he dropped it in the water and made me dive after it. Peter and Sirius couldn't swim. So, personally, I think my name calling was justified. Anyway, I'll see you around, sometime when you're not busy being a know-it-all goody two shoes, okay Evans?"  
  
"Fine, Potter, see you when you're not to busy being 'cool.' Rowena." Lily's whispered password unlocked the door and she stepped into the Ravenclaw common room.  
  
James stared at the washroom door for awhile and then stormed up to the Gryffindor tower. He glared at the Fat Lady, who asked him the password cheerfully (heaven forbid) and practically yelled it at her.  
  
"It's Sonsumbrationalist, okay! Do you not know that I'm a friggin' Gryffindor by now? I've been living in this tower for practically 6 years, including Christmas and Easter, so you'd think that you'd know! Just let me the bloody hell in, okay? Why do I even have to tell you the password! You should have memorized my face by now! Do you stupid paintings have no memory? Do you even have brains? Do you even care that some girl pulled out my heart and stomped on it because I was being nice to her? SO JUST LET ME IN THE BLOODY TOWER, OKAY? I TOLD YOU THE PASSWORD, YOU KNOW MY FACE, SO LET ME- THE-BLOODY-HELL-IN!"  
  
James calmed down to find that the portrait had long since been opened and that a second year was nervously waiting for him to go in. In fact, he had been waiting for several minutes now. James scowled at the 'stupid' portrait and crawled into the hole that lead to the common room. As soon as they two Gryffindors reached the open air space of the common room, the second year scuttled away fearfully from James. Since it was a Sunday, there were quite a few Gryffindors working on homework and playing Exploding Snap. Most of them had heard his tirade, so several younger kids leaned away from his general direction and most of the older kids smiled at him and laughed.  
  
"Hey, James," said Sirius, walking towards him and leading to girls by the hands, "Meet Amanda-" Sirius gestured to the girl he was holding slightly closer than nessecary- "And Catherine. It's a Hogsmeade weekend next one, so we wanted to know if you wanted to go on a double date sorta thing. I'm going with Amanda." The short blonde girl smiled up at Sirius and looked at James as if to say- if you don't leave Sirius and me some snogging time, you are so going to pay. James looked at Catherine, who had sat next to him on the couch and was perhaps a bit more attractive than James wanted to think about right now. 'Parading thru the halls, flinging your snitch everywhere, flirting with girls-"  
  
"Sirius, don't even think about it." Said James angrily before walking out of the common room once again to wander the halls.  
  
A/n: I know, I know, it was a short chapter. I'm sorry, won't happen again. (well, maybe just one or two times) But anyways, lots of funny stuff happened. Right? Don't you just ache to tell me how wonderful this chapter was? Really? You wish you could, but you don't know how? This is great! I know how, I can teach you! There is a small purple button on the bottom left hand side of the screen. Yes, that one-yes, right there! Now, push it- VERY GOOD! Now type in how wonderful my story is...REVIEW YOU FOOLISH SCUM SUCKING CRETINS OF THE UN-REVIEWING WORLD! DO IT BEFORE I AM FORCED TO FLAME ALL YOUR STORIES! To all you, nice, gentle, smart, beautiful, generous, creative intelligent reviewing people out there, (which there do not seem to be many of! Only 19 in fact!) thank you for your support! AND REVIEW BEFORE I TOAST YOU IN THE FIREBALL OF EVIL CRUEL, UNMERCIFUL, UNFORGIVING FLAMES TO BE GIVEN TO ALL YOUR STORIES WHETER THEY ARE GOOD OR NOT!  
  
P.S.: As a notice for people who WILL review(right?), I find it funny that to actually uphold on my threat, I will have to flame every person that doesn't review my story. That would take a long time. But that's just between us, right? Nobody else will know, so they'll still review!!! AS YOU CAN TELL, I'M HYPER, and the a/n's have taken more room than the actual fic. 


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